Overprotective Essay

If the phrase “overprotective parents” was in the dictionary, you would see a picture of my parents there. They are having a very hard time with me being away from school and did not like the distance I was putting between them. My parents set ground rules for me while at school, that I must call or text them every day and it now feels like we are talking more here than we did at home. In particular my mother is very offended when I don’t talk with her every day and feels that I talk with my sister and my father more than I talk with her. I do not intend to do anything like that but she does work making it harder for me to talk to her. She also limited what I could and could not do when I was in high school. If I ever wanted to hang out with anyone she needed to know who would be there, what time we would get there and leave, where would we be, what exactly would we do, and the list went on and on. 

Now my mother didn’t have to do this when she was a child, being the last of six she was the baby of the family and could do what she wanted. She even was allowed to get on a plane by herself at the age of sixteen and fly to Arizona to visit a friend of hers. This past summer I had the opportunity to visit my cousin in Chicago alone and was not allowed to go because “it’s a different world now.” That phrase seems to be uttered all the time from my parents. The world is so different from what they grew up in and they can’t accept that the world will always be changing and evolving.  It's not fair that they lived in a different world and with them constantly breathing down my neck, I don't know what it's like to be independent. I don’t want to call my parents all the time but I do because it's weird for me to go a day without talking to them. I've already called my dad today to thank him for the Mallomars that came in a care package. My parents are great although they are overbearing. It's nice they know me so well but I want to be able to mature on my own. That being said, I am currently looking at how to get home this weekend... isn't it ironic?

I feel as though a huge reason why more parents are overprotective would have to be because of the recent fear of terrorist attacks. With the thirteenth anniversary of 9/11 having just passed, the comparisons of what the world used to be and what it is now are extremely different. As a parent, there is that fear that something like that could happen again and you just want to protect your kids. I understand that. At the same time, your kids do need to learn to be independent and not go running to mommy with every problem they have. Being the oldest child, I think it’s hard for them to accept that I am no longer their little girl and am on my way to becoming an adult all on my own. They have shaped me the best they can and now need to learn it’s time for me to mature on my own.

Their parenting styles now are considered the norm, but in Hanna Rosin’s article “The Overprotective Kid” is quoted:  “Even though women work vastly more hours now than they did in the 1970s, mothers—and fathers—of all income levels spend much more time with their children than they used to…It’s hard to absorb how much childhood norms have shifted in just one generation. Actions that would have been considered paranoid in the ’70s—walking third-graders to school, forbidding your kid to play ball in the street, going down the slide with your child in your lap—are now routine. In fact, they are the markers of good, responsible parenting.”  We have to understand that there are different concerns now in this world but there needs to be a line drawn somewhere. If a parent was able to get away with something, it’s not fair to limit your child. For example, during my senior year I went to a party where there was underage drinking and when I noticed one girl was not doing well, I stayed past my curfew to take care of her because it seemed like the right thing to do. I wasn’t going to go a leave a girl who couldn’t take care of herself at a party where she didn’t know anyone, it didn’t seem right to just leave her there. Despite doing what I thought was the right thing to do, I was still punished for attending the party. Even though I grew up hearing stories of the time when my father threw a party and had the fridge full of beer, I was the one who he kept causing trouble. My dad and I both did similar things, while his was more extreme, I received more of a punishment for my actions where I thought I was helping someone from possibly getting injured or doing something they couldn’t consent to. I thought I was doing what my overprotective parents would do and yet they were blaming me for doing it? It just seems very hypocritical in my opinion.

I don’t hate my parents. I actually get along with them very well. We tend to like the same music and I don’t yell at them at all, compared to my little sister. Yes they are overprotective but I really feel badly for my sister, as they probably will be worse on her. I know that already they are talking about me and what they think I could be doing right now and etc. I don’t think my parents know they need to balance their overprotectiveness in accordance to their letting me mature. Hopefully they’ll find a balance soon and I can start to deal with my own issues, like blowing the fuse in my dorm room.